When you are stuck between volatile childcare arrangements, too much to do and too little time to accomplish any of your smaller and greater plans, it’s easy to forget that behind the clouds, the sun is shining. I have been taking some time off – off the computer, off bars raised too high and off this so-called summer.
On a bit of a whim, we had booked a week in St Tropez, and even when our flights to Nice got cancelled the day before our departure, we stuck to the plan and ‘just’ jumped in the car, drove through the night and into the sunrise. 16 hours with two small kids in the car – and there they dare to say young parents weren’t spontaneous.
It’s been so worth it. Finally some sun on the skin, finally the beach, finally some sand between the toes. I have been going to St Tropez for ages – it’ll be 20 years next year – and I just don’t seem to tire of the place. I love it in the quieter season just before the high season. And I love seeing my girls grow fond of the little village just like I did.
Spending time with the children and doing little else (France is a bit third world when it comes to Internet, really), I realised that although I have the fastest possible Internet connection at home, and emails, blogs and social media pour in over three different iCloud’ed devices, I get little more done than when I am on holiday. With the big difference that I am stressed about it at home and relaxed when I am not.
As a solution, I have decided to retire into permanent vacation.
I have decided to lower my expectations. Before I left, I had been working on an exciting project. But I had felt nothing but frustration about it, as I couldn’t give it the attention and time it needs and deserves. As long as the Pea doesn’t start nursery, I will be unable to get stuck in any kind of work that requires more than 20 minutes of my undivided attention. I can cut out an hour here and there, even a whole morning once in a while, but that’s about it.
I don’t want to feel frustrated or discontented, especially not around the girls. I just don’t do frustrated.
We will spend the coming couple of weeks in the park and on playdates, meeting friends for lunch and vandalising museums. There’s another family holiday coming up, after that it’s BIG school for Lil’ L and a couple of mornings nursery for the Pea, who’s first birthday it is in September. Time flies. And is way too precious to be spent frustrated.