Author: Metropolitan Mum

All going south

It’s done. We have sold our house! I didn’t tell a soul, mainly because I didn’t want to jinx it, but after accepting an offer a few weeks ago, we have exchanged whilst on vacation and will complete four days after our return. No, I am not panicking. (Christ, where’s Whisky when you need it?) […]

Breaking up for summer

The past few weeks have been oddly exhausting. Not because of what has happened; rather because of what could have happened. It’s all good news (or potentially none at all), but still, being kept in limbo for weeks, depending on a multitude of other people to make it happen (or not) has been wearing me […]

Who would you choose for me?

Being partly adopted, as a child I often wondered how life had turned out had my mother left me with my grandparents. Had I been the one to choose, I am sure my childhood would have turned out less wounding. Certainly, foster parents do a great job in a huge number of cases. But if […]

The man in Grandma’s bed

The knock on the door must have fallen on deaf ears. Taking a deep breath, I push the handle down and step inside, prepared to be overwhelmed by the sweet smell of rotten flowers and stale air. ‘Hello Grandma.’ I bend down and wrap my arms around the old lady’s shoulders, resting my cheek against […]

I write like Ernest Hemingway

I write like Ernest Hemingway. Says website I write. Their innovative and technologically advanced analysis tool evaluates your writing style and gives a pretty *coughs*  accurate account of which famous writer you are comparable to. Ernest and me. Like two peas in a pod. Apart from my liking for rum cola, I am having a hard time figuring […]

Like a virgin (sprayed for the very first time)

When I first arrived in London, one sunny day in April 2005, three things struck me as far more bizarre than the usual craziness you’d expect from moving countries: Left-hand-traffic and its potential to provide for my untimely death. The diminutive effect on £550 if put towards a flatshare in Notting Hill. Streaky shades of […]