Mummy stuff, Pregnancy

Three months and counting

photo014Little L has been three months today. Striking a balance under the past three months seems to be almost impossible, as life without her is close to unimaginable. Again, I am surprised by how true it is what everybody says: once your baby entered your life, life without her seems like a distant memory. And: it does get easier with time.

Unfortunately, lack of sleep is still getting to me. Little L has been sleeping through for a few weeks (I know, I am blessed!), but I don’t seem to be able to catch up. I am going to bed between 9 and 10PM, don’t get up before 7AM, and I nap at least once a day. Still, I am constantly tired. Not-capable-of-driving-a-car-tired.

Nature isn’t fair in the sense that most women find it hard to sleep towards the end of their pregnancy, when all they really should do just before having a baby is sleep. In addition, a birth can be quite exhausting (so I heard…), but you never get the time to recover from it. It’s a bit like doing a sprint and trying to recover with a marathon.

I still haven’t put in the complaint against that awful midwife. In the beginning, I was just too emotional about the whole experience. I dreamt of her a few times and woke up shaking. And although I think I am over it now, I still don’t want to let her get away with this kind of behaviour. The complaint is on top of my list for things to be tackled after our vacation.

A propos vacation. I cannot wait to get away for a few days. And to have support in looking after little L. Having a husband who is working long hours and is away overnight every once in a while, gives me a taste of what it must be like as a single parent. I am not sure I would cope.

Very much to Big M’s surprise, we managed to get this far without dropping our daughter. I am not sure where he got the idea from, but he was almost convinced we would drop her at an early age. (???) We only had one health scare so far – a sore patch inside her neck’s crease. Kind of a dislocated nappy rash. Enough to make me cry and beg the receptionist to make the GP see us right away. I know, I am pathetic.

Very much to my own surprise, I am enjoying breastfeeding. After my initial struggle, I managed to find a rhythm that works for both of us. Little L falling asleep while feeding is the sweetest image I have ever seen, and I wouldn’t want to miss it for a million pounds!

Although the best experience in my life, having a baby is by far the most exhausting project I have ever taken on. The other day, I was wondering if I would ever feel broody again, and how on earth people could do it again. And again. On purpose! And then I saw this. And there was this funny twinge in my tummy…


  1. It is both forever and no time at all.

    I’m with you already know we haven’t finished welcoming our babies and have conveniently forgotten how rotten I felt in the last few weeks of pregnancy.

  2. PS – with my Bambino Goodies hat on, WHERE did the yummy blankets come from? Please do let me know!

  3. I too had a really really awful midwife the first time round and could not get over it until we put in a formal complaint and met with all sorts of important people at the hospital about it etc and it did help with closure. She thankfully retired before my second was born, otherwise i would have seriously gone to a different hospital, rather than risk getting her again. It is so sad that these women get away with it and leave us so traumatised, with something which should be the happiest moment of our lives.
    PS two is easier than one! – you are so busy you don’t have time to stop and think about anything!

  4. Sounds like you are getting into the swing of things now. Thanks for tag. And, I have to tell you, I am consumed in jealousy about Little L’s sleeping. My rather bigger L is still a terrible sleeper at 2 1/2. We occasionally get a night where he sleeps until 6. I was up this morning at 4.30 with one bright, cheeky little boy full of energy and raring to go. Needless to say, I was NOT.

  5. Thank you for the link. I am at the end stage where I cannot sleep and everything aches and I just want this baby now. I am sure there have been parts when I enjoyed being pregnant but it has been tough on me and my body. People keep telling me to sleep but they have no idea how hard it is to get comfortable at all!

    I am pleased to read that it does get easier with time. Congratulations on surviving your first three months :o)

  6. @Kat: The blanket was a present from my mum in law. It has little L’s name and date of birth woven in; I love it!

    @Elsie: Haha. That’s a way of looking at it, true. But for now, better not tell Big M about the funny tummy twinges, he might think I went insane…

    @BiB: Luckily, little L seems to take after her father, as I am a very poor sleeper. 4:30 sounds painful!

    @Dancinfairy: I know, I remember being propped up on 200 pillows and having to move the whole installation when I wanted to move. And then the problem with the sciatica… Nope, I didn’t enjoy the last days either.

  7. I never know how mothers get anything done. I really sympathathize abut the constant sleep deprivation.

    Knowing that my partner would be absent for up to 8 months a year was a big part of my decision not to go for motherhood.

  8. Hmm, I still haven’t complained about my awful midwife. Probably won’t now, 22 months on and after a lovely birth second time around.
    Happy 3 month birthday Little L x

  9. Even those who haven’t given birth (like me) feel knackered looking after small people all the time. Just off for a nap…

  10. Three months already?! Wow! It seems so slow at the time and sooo exhausting but the time flies by really, doesn’t it? In a few short months you’ll have your energy back, little L will be into a new phase and new-motherhood will be a distant memory. You’re doing great :o)

  11. I remember reading an article years ago that compared giving birth to having open heart surgery in terms of what it does to your body and how long it takes to recover. I know many women go shopping the next day etc. etc, but it’s not surprising that most of us are completely knackered – for a very long time. (And then they start staying up later than you and you never get to sleep.)

  12. @Lulu: It all seemed so easy from the outside. And now I’m eating my words…

    @Sandy: Honestly, I think you should. But then I know how little time you have to yourself anyway, and with two little ones running around there must be even less spare time.

    @Tim: Napping should be an olympic sport. I’d be the first to take part. And win, of course 😉

    @Rachel: I knoooow, I am always torn between thinking time flies too fast and time doesn’t pass quick enough.
    (And yes, I have seen it. And I am ridiculously proud, hehe. Congrats to you as well!)

    @Expat Mum: With the difference that they wouldn’t give you a newborn to look after and deprive you of sleep after open heart surgery.
    Staying up late? You’ve got to be joking, sobb, sobb.

  13. Leave the midwife worries – enjoy your time, you can deal with that later when you have more energy.
    It’s more exhausting the first time because we’re just not used to it. Second and more, it actually becomes easier.

  14. You’ve done the hardest part. Sure, there are challenges in every stage, but you never have that initial shocking life-change again. From here on, the changes are pretty gradual.

  15. @Joanne: After the vacation, as I said. It’s not that I want to pay her back or something like that. But I keep thinking of other women who might come across her. And who might not have the great support I had…

    @Iota: Thanks, I would be pretty depressed if the changes would continue to come down on me at the same pace, hehe…

  16. Very True – the most exhausting project ever! I used to repeat to myself the mantra of “It WILL get easier” and it does – my girl is 4 now. Somethings are easier, some are harder but all of it is a complete joy. Never did change my mind on having just the one though!

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